All of these things at once

You don't know how it is up here
Laugh a bit, pretend you're clean
And that you'll never touch monsters again
The high flow of it in my veins
The heaven and hell of causality
Yes, maybe I should try
Sing a lullabye and erase it from memory
It's not the same
An angel got fucked in the ass by Satan
A heresy got drowned in smiles and awe
The virgin was bloodstained
The sky was tainted with profanities
A murder was the supreme blessing
All of these things at once
And nothing's awkward
All these channels at once
And nothing on
Hair grows in despair through electronic devices
Smoke is nothing but bodies of dead indians
There's something to be said of all of this
I just don't know what